août 282010
 

J’ai longtemps pensé que le plus mauvais film du monde était Hard Ticket to Hawaii mais j’avais peut-être tort.

I used to think the worst movie ever was Hard Ticket to Hawaii but may be I was wrong, so very wrong.

Ninjas, beer, mulets,  fighting, ear rings, rock & roll, everything is in this movie. And it is a real movie !

Awesome! « Hey guys I’m takin a shower first. » « Go for it Jim ». » They sound like nice guys. But it looks like they finish —getting beer poured on their heads and all. I hope they teach those chumps a lesson! And I hope Jim can overcome the struggles he is facing with being half Korean and half « Black American. » Oh My God-Oh My God-Oh My God- Oh My God!!!

[Miami Connection]

août 272010
 


Seriously, don’t try this at home

So anyone who’s seen a hay bailer IRL knows that thing will cut you apart without a moment’s hesitation… The bales aren’t square because it packs them square… it cuts them square..

Ne faites pas ça chez vous !

Si cette vidéo était réalisée sans trucage, le bonhomme à poil serait décapité et démembré. La moissonneuse  coupe en forme de cube et ne compresse pas.


août 222010
 

Men and Women are very different, but sometimes they can be very much alike, especially when it comes to dating.

Les hommes et les femmes ne sont pas si différents. Si vous allez sur des sites de rencontre et que vous testes vos compatibilités, il y a de fortes chances pour que le résultat soit équivalent de celui ci-dessus.  Oui, des attentes similaires, une perception différente de ces attentes.

août 202010
 

Dr. Lucien Sanchez’s Song I’m A One Track Lover From The Episode ‘The Creeping Moss From The Shores Of Shuggoth’ Showing His Love For Liz.

« Holy shit, that’s a PERFECT parody of 80s pop–the synthesizers, the introspective & over-wrought lyrics, the cheesy guitar solo, the neon-lit nightclub scene, the obligatory rap verse, even the rain on the window pane. Gotta love Daglis in that ultra-short kimono of his, too. Fuck, Darkplace was such a work of genius. »

Le boss de The IT Crowd qui nous pousse sa chansonnette des 80′s. Tout y est, les coupes pleines de laque, les gros plans, le guitariste sur le toit, les regards en coin,  la laque encore,… Et Moss en barman.

août 142010
 

This is the missing scene (starts at 2:15) from Return of the Jedi where Luke is building his Lightsaber in a cave on Tattooine. Taken at The Main Event at Star Wars Celebration V.

Voici pour la première fois la scène manquante du Retour du Jedi (elle commence à 2:15), celle où on voit Luke Skywalker fabriquer son sabre laser dans une grotte de Tattooine. On le voit même l’allumer, on sait enfin comment Luke a eu son sabre laser vert.

août 112010
 

The Chive wrote :

We received the following photos last night from a person who works with this girl. Her name is Jenny (not confirmed) – we’re working our contact for Jenny’s last name. Yesterday morning, Jenny quit her job with a (flash)bang by emailing these photos to the entire office, about 20 employees we’re told.

Le site The Chive a reçu les photos suivantes par email. Elles ont été envoyé par une personne qui travaille avec cette fille. Son nom serait Jenny. Avant de démissionner, Jenny a envoyer cette série de photos à tous les employés de sa société.  (Une vingtaine). J’imagine que maintenant, son boss (s’il existe réellement) se fait tout petit.Ce n’est pas sans rappeler ce message laissé sur l’appareil photo de ce type.

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amazing girl quits 1 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 2 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 3 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 4 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 5 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 6 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 7 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 8 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 9 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 10 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 11 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 12 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 13 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 14 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 15 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 16 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 17 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 18 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 19 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 20 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 21 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 22 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 23 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 24 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 25 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 26 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 27 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 28 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 29 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 30 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 31 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

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amazing girl quits 32 Girl quits her job on dry erase board, emails entire office (33 Photos)

EPIC !

This is a Fake. Of cource, but well done.

Il s’agit d’un Fake,pour promouvoir le site The Chive. Bravo !

[The Chive]

août 102010
 

Drunk russian guy wants to dress his pants as a top.

Been there, done that, got the pant shirt.

Après une journée à la plage, un homme russe, vraisemblablement ivre, essaie d’enfiler son pantalon comme un T-Shirt. Le pire c’est qu’il se fait aider (2’05 ») par un homme secourable qui ne réalisera l’erreur que tardivement.

août 082010
 

Erica Goldson graduated as valedictorian of Coxsackie-Athens High School. Instead of using her graduation speech to celebrate the triumph of her victory, the school, and the teachers that made it happen, she channeled her inner Ivan Illich and de-constructed the logic of a valedictorian and the whole educational system. Here is her speech :

Here I stand

There is a story of a young, but earnest Zen student who approached his teacher, and asked the Master, « If I work very hard and diligently, how long will it take for me to find Zen? The Master thought about this, then replied, « Ten years . . » The student then said, « But what if I work very, very hard and really apply myself to learn fast — How long then? » Replied the Master, « Well, twenty years. » « But, if I really, really work at it, how long then? » asked the student. « Thirty years, » replied the Master. « But, I do not understand, » said the disappointed student. « At each time that I say I will work harder, you say it will take me longer. Why do you say that? » Replied the Master, « When you have one eye on the goal, you only have one eye on the path. »

This is the dilemma I’ve faced within the American education system. We are so focused on a goal, whether it be passing a test, or graduating as first in the class. However, in this way, we do not really learn. We do whatever it takes to achieve our original objective.

Some of you may be thinking, « Well, if you pass a test, or become valedictorian, didn’t you learn something? Well, yes, you learned something, but not all that you could have. Perhaps, you only learned how to memorize names, places, and dates to later on forget in order to clear your mind for the next test. School is not all that it can be. Right now, it is a place for most people to determine that their goal is to get out as soon as possible.

I am now accomplishing that goal. I am graduating. I should look at this as a positive experience, especially being at the top of my class. However, in retrospect, I cannot say that I am any more intelligent than my peers. I can attest that I am only the best at doing what I am told and working the system. Yet, here I stand, and I am supposed to be proud that I have completed this period of indoctrination. I will leave in the fall to go on to the next phase expected of me, in order to receive a paper document that certifies that I am capable of work. But I contest that I am a human being, a thinker, an adventurer – not a worker. A worker is someone who is trapped within repetition – a slave of the system set up before him. But now, I have successfully shown that I was the best slave. I did what I was told to the extreme. While others sat in class and doodled to later become great artists, I sat in class to take notes and become a great test-taker. While others would come to class without their homework done because they were reading about an interest of theirs, I never missed an assignment. While others were creating music and writing lyrics, I decided to do extra credit, even though I never needed it. So, I wonder, why did I even want this position? Sure, I earned it, but what will come of it? When I leave educational institutionalism, will I be successful or forever lost? I have no clue about what I want to do with my life; I have no interests because I saw every subject of study as work, and I excelled at every subject just for the purpose of excelling, not learning. And quite frankly, now I’m scared.

John Taylor Gatto, a retired school teacher and activist critical of compulsory schooling, asserts, « We could encourage the best qualities of youthfulness – curiosity, adventure, resilience, the capacity for surprising insight simply by being more flexible about time, texts, and tests, by introducing kids into truly competent adults, and by giving each student what autonomy he or she needs in order to take a risk every now and then. But we don’t do that. » Between these cinderblock walls, we are all expected to be the same. We are trained to ace every standardized test, and those who deviate and see light through a different lens are worthless to the scheme of public education, and therefore viewed with contempt.

H. L. Mencken wrote in The American Mercury for April 1924 that the aim of public education is not « to fill the young of the species with knowledge and awaken their intelligence. … Nothing could be further from the truth. The aim … is simply to reduce as many individuals as possible to the same safe level, to breed and train a standardized citizenry, to put down dissent and originality. That is its aim in the United States. »

To illustrate this idea, doesn’t it perturb you to learn about the idea of « critical thinking. » Is there really such a thing as « uncritically thinking? » To think is to process information in order to form an opinion. But if we are not critical when processing this information, are we really thinking? Or are we mindlessly accepting other opinions as truth?

This was happening to me, and if it wasn’t for the rare occurrence of an avant-garde tenth grade English teacher, Donna Bryan, who allowed me to open my mind and ask questions before accepting textbook doctrine, I would have been doomed. I am now enlightened, but my mind still feels disabled. I must retrain myself and constantly remember how insane this ostensibly sane place really is.

And now here I am in a world guided by fear, a world suppressing the uniqueness that lies inside each of us, a world where we can either acquiesce to the inhuman nonsense of corporatism and materialism or insist on change. We are not enlivened by an educational system that clandestinely sets us up for jobs that could be automated, for work that need not be done, for enslavement without fervency for meaningful achievement. We have no choices in life when money is our motivational force. Our motivational force ought to be passion, but this is lost from the moment we step into a system that trains us, rather than inspires us.

We are more than robotic bookshelves, conditioned to blurt out facts we were taught in school. We are all very special, every human on this planet is so special, so aren’t we all deserving of something better, of using our minds for innovation, rather than memorization, for creativity, rather than futile activity, for rumination rather than stagnation? We are not here to get a degree, to then get a job, so we can consume industry-approved placation after placation. There is more, and more still.

The saddest part is that the majority of students don’t have the opportunity to reflect as I did. The majority of students are put through the same brainwashing techniques in order to create a complacent labor force working in the interests of large corporations and secretive government, and worst of all, they are completely unaware of it. I will never be able to turn back these 18 years. I can’t run away to another country with an education system meant to enlighten rather than condition. This part of my life is over, and I want to make sure that no other child will have his or her potential suppressed by powers meant to exploit and control. We are human beings. We are thinkers, dreamers, explorers, artists, writers, engineers. We are anything we want to be – but only if we have an educational system that supports us rather than holds us down. A tree can grow, but only if its roots are given a healthy foundation.

For those of you out there that must continue to sit in desks and yield to the authoritarian ideologies of instructors, do not be disheartened. You still have the opportunity to stand up, ask questions, be critical, and create your own perspective. Demand a setting that will provide you with intellectual capabilities that allow you to expand your mind instead of directing it. Demand that you be interested in class. Demand that the excuse, « You have to learn this for the test » is not good enough for you. Education is an excellent tool, if used properly, but focus more on learning rather than getting good grades.

For those of you that work within the system that I am condemning, I do not mean to insult; I intend to motivate. You have the power to change the incompetencies of this system. I know that you did not become a teacher or administrator to see your students bored. You cannot accept the authority of the governing bodies that tell you what to teach, how to teach it, and that you will be punished if you do not comply. Our potential is at stake.

For those of you that are now leaving this establishment, I say, do not forget what went on in these classrooms. Do not abandon those that come after you. We are the new future and we are not going to let tradition stand. We will break down the walls of corruption to let a garden of knowledge grow throughout America. Once educated properly, we will have the power to do anything, and best of all, we will only use that power for good, for we will be cultivated and wise. We will not accept anything at face value. We will ask questions, and we will demand truth.

So, here I stand. I am not standing here as valedictorian by myself. I was molded by my environment, by all of my peers who are sitting here watching me. I couldn’t have accomplished this without all of you. It was all of you who truly made me the person I am today. It was all of you who were my competition, yet my backbone. In that way, we are all valedictorians.

I am now supposed to say farewell to this institution, those who maintain it, and those who stand with me and behind me, but I hope this farewell is more of a « see you later » when we are all working together to rear a pedagogic movement. But first, let’s go get those pieces of paper that tell us that we’re smart enough to do so!


[SwiftKickOnline]